Trans People Have Had Enough of Democrats’ Waffling on LGBTQ+ Issues

Marigold, a 17-year-old transgender girl from Ohio, never expected to lobby for her own rights to Congress.

But with anti-trans sentiment becoming a key part of the Republican agenda, she wanted to have a say. So earlier this month, she and nearly 70 other trans people and their loved ones traveled to Washington to meet with lawmakers — most of whom were Democrats — to demand their support. She told her teachers and friends that she needed to miss school: “I’m going to speak in front of Congress.”

Her goal was for lawmakers to remember that they’re dealing with real lives, not just politics.

“I want to put a face to the oppression. I want to be a person instead of a concept that they’re changing these rights and rules,” said Marigold, who asked to be referred to by only her first name to protect her privacy. “I want them to know that they’re visibly and immediately affecting my life and hundreds of other kids’ lives with what could easily be described as a wave of their hand.”

Since the start of President Donald Trump’s second term in office, his administration and congressional Republicans have worked to enact restrictions for trans people around health care and access to sports. Democrats have struggled to respond, with many politicians and consultants considering it politically risky to speak on trans issues after Trump managed to weaponize them in the 2024 election.

A February 2025 poll from the Pew Research Center found that Americans have grown more supportive of restrictions for trans people: 56% say they support making it illegal to for health providers to offer gender-affirming care to minors, compared to 46% in 2022; and 66% support requiring trans athletes to compete on teams that match their sex at birth, up from 58% in 2022.

The people most affected by these policies, though, are growing tired of Democrats staying on the sidelines.

Rosie, a mom from New Hampshire who asked to be referred to by only her first name for privacy, traveled to D.C. with her 9-year-old daughter Emily, who is trans, to advocate to her state’s members of Congress. The first time Emily visited Congress with her mom was in late 2024, when the Supreme Court heard oral arguments in U.S. v Skrmetti, a case over whether state bans on gender-affirming care were constitutional. Emily was 7.

Rosie said she felt it was “important” for Emily to be in those meetings.

“I really want her to know that there are people in high places who are fighting for her,” she said. “And I feel like it’s really important to know that even as a kid, you have a voice and it matters.”

The justices ruled last summer that gender-affirming care bans were constitutional. Two months later, New Hampshire enacted laws banning this type of care for trans youth. Emily’s family travels out of state to access her health care.

Rosie said she wants politicians to know that she and others “are making decisions about who we vote for based on the way that they stand up for the most marginalized.”

“We’re not going to get anywhere as a country when people are afraid to put their necks out for our most marginalized and our most at risk,” Rosie continued. “I can get the politics of it, I just think it’s B.S. You’re there to represent your constituents and not to get reelected.”

Rep. Sarah McBride, the first openly trans member of Congress, welcomed the group that assembled at the Capitol to speak with lawmakers. The effort, called Democracy Days, was organized by Advocates for Trans Equality and the American Civil Liberties Union. In the lead-up to the lobbying day, the groups trained trans people and their loved ones on how to speak with lawmakers and their offices to advocate for their rights.

“This is a dark time in our country, a challenging time in our country. It’s a particularly scary time to be trans in this country. I’m scared,” McBride told the attendees as they prepared to visit congressional offices.

But she offered them hope: “I already see people who, after the last presidential election, you could see start to waver.”

“I see it in the conversations, individual conversations I have with my colleagues — some Democrats who were getting a little nervous and Republicans who thought that the days of bipartisan support for trans rights were over. I see a thought. I’m experiencing it,” McBride continued. “I hope that you feel that armor as you go into this work today.”

Some vulnerable Democrats are seemingly reevaluating how they approach the issue.

An aide for Rep. Marie Gluesenkamp Perez, whose seat is one of House Republicans’ top targets, met with a group of three trans adult women and one trans girl and her dad from Washington state.

The aide “did push back and say, like, ‘I’m from a moderate district and my representative is trying to thread those needles,’” one of the trans women said, asking to speak anonymously for privacy reasons. She said that the pushback was a welcome element.

Mat Tillison, who was in the room with his daughter, a trans 15-year-old, concurred: “There was an energy there that allowed us to interact with her and help her understand what she can take back. She didn’t just let us word vomit and then go, ‘Thank you.’ She was like, ‘OK, let me follow up with a question then.’ She was honestly trying her best as an aide to understand how to represent our story to her representative.”

“I deeply appreciate everyone from Southwest Washington who shares their story with me — it’s not possible to do this work perfectly but I’m proud to work hard everyday to show up for my constituents,” Gluesenkamp Perez said in a statement to NOTUS.

Ian Thompson, a senior legislative advocate for the ACLU, said in a statement that the group is “thankful to Congresswoman Gluesenkamp-Perez and her staff for meeting in good faith with these constituents and hearing their experiences under this administration.”

As the midterm cycle gets underway, LGBTQ+ rights groups are trying to become more involved in guiding Democratic candidates. The Human Rights Campaign in January unveiled a step-by-step messaging playbook on LGBTQ+ issues in hopes of helping candidates prepare for Republicans to attack them over their stances on trans rights.

It’s unclear whether Democrats will buy in. Rep. Vicente Gonzalez, a conservative Democrat in a competitive South Texas district, essentially scoffed at the guidance.

“Members know best, know the people in their districts best, and I don’t think we should be listening to groups in Washington to try to tell us how to message our own home district,” he told NOTUS.

Gonzalez, who said he supports the Equality Act, a bill that would explicitly prohibit discrimination based on sex, sexual orientation, and gender identity, has voted twice in support of GOP bills banning trans athletes from playing in sports teams that that align with their gender identity, as well as prohibiting trans youth from accessing gender-affirming care.

When asked about trans individuals who are urging their lawmakers to back their community, Gonzalez said, “I’ve had deep conversations with the LGBT community in South Texas, and they understand that’s a tough vote, and we agree on 99% of the issues, but we don’t always agree on 100%.”

“I think they should allow members to vote their conscience and the values of their district and bring that seat home,” Gonzalez added.

The Congressional Equality Caucus has regularly hosted events to educate members of Congress and their staff about trans issues, but has also struggled to get lawmakers to attend, Rep. Becca Balint, one of the group’s co-chairs, told NOTUS. She said they have “had a problem with leakers.”

“You have a situation where there are members who genuinely want to get information, and they want to be able to ask their question in a safe place, and unfortunately, right now, there are so many members who are leaking not just general concepts of what we talk about, but tying it to specific people,” Balint said. “That has a chilling effect.”

Trans people and their family members said they would like Democrats to set those concerns aside. Many of the people who visited Washington for the day of advocacy said they hope it will be the last time. They just want lawmakers to let them live their lives.

“I don’t want my whole life as a parent through my children’s teenage years to be spent every year in anxiety about something like this,” Tillison said. “I’d rather not have to think about it. I’d rather my kid not have to think about it.”

His daughter agreed: “It is very draining.”